i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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