Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
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