The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
