He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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