Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
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