Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
