dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Randomize
