More tranny stories later!
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
