Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
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My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
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Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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