OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
