You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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