shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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