I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him