I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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