i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize