Fine. I'll sleep in my office
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
