"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize