alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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