My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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