Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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