Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
