dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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