Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
