So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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