i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
COCAINE IS GR8
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
