I think im going to throw up on grandma
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
we're making bets on your personal life
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
