We're facebook friends in real life
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
