I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize