Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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