Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
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