This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
