two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
