Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
