No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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