If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Four minutes until I can fart!
It was confusing and full of hummus
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
