She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
