Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
