he thought i was a dude.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Randomize
