I like to think it a success when the cops are called
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
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