it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
