yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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