Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
