I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
organizing the empties. That sober.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
