In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I think a kid would responsible me up
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.