So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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