Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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