it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
