Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
