$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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