So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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