When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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